What are you doing? Why are you doing it?

[fujimaru]

But let's be real, when have any of us actually known that?

IN GENERAL: 1. Spoiler-experienced through the end of Part One 2. Spoiler-aware through current 3. Spoiler osmosis, ish, for events in all other fates 4. OTA Seriously I don't care if they've actually showed up in a fate property or if they're an AU of someone who has, cross-canon, OC, whatever; OTA is Open To All 5. Including for shipping because I'm easy and so is Ritsuka* * Not like, EASY EASY easy, but you know, easy. M/F, F/F, handholding or smut, however things go! 6. Flexible for commentspam and/or longer comments. 7. Hello friends please play with me (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ If you'd rather I write a starter just lmk!

Comments

[onelastknight]

Well, I think in that case we would deserve a little bit of being yelled at.

[fujimaru]

Saber! Be on my side just a little!!

[ She makes a fist with one hand, pounding it halfheartedly against the countertop. ]

Do you know what it's like, having to stand there for a whole twenty minutes -- I timed it once -- and listen to him scold you... it's like he's got the soul of a mother, or something...

[onelastknight]

I think the only way to avoid that is to be careful. Don't worry, Master. Even in the kitchen, I'll be sure to protect you from harm.

[fujimaru]

[ Is this what actual chivalry is like?! Whoa...

She takes a moment to just stare at him, then coughs. ]

Well, good. I'll be in your care, Saber.

[onelastknight]

Then, do you want to learn right now?

[fujimaru]

[ For a moment she stays in the same position, half-melted on the counter, then abruptly pushes herself up, brightening. ]

--You know what, yeah. Let's do it.

[onelastknight]

[ He proceeds to walk you through some basic cooking techniques! First by demonstrating, and then offering up, what were we cooking, potatoes? He offers up a potato as sacrifice. Give it your best shot ]

[fujimaru]

[ Well, it's not great, but it's at least better than Comically Anime Bad. The slices are lopsided and there is at least one close encounter with the edge of the knife and her fingers.

In the end, what they're left with is a pile of potato chunks in various sizes and thicknesses. Hm. ]

...That's better than nothing, I guess...

[onelastknight]

It's much better than nothing. In something like a stew or a casserole, these would be fine.

[fujimaru]

And no casualties.

[ She holds up both hands, wiggling her fingers. Look Ma Emiya, no cuts! ]

People always make it look a lot easier on TV.

[onelastknight]

I'm sure they have much more practice. It gets easier the more you do it.