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[fujimaru]

Ritsuka Fujimaru | 藤丸 立香
19(?) / F / Who knows!!

This is Ritsuka! Leave a message and I'll get back to you.

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[impostorsyndrome]

[Maybe he could . . . put his arm around her? It's a little chilly! Maybe she'd appreciate it! God, he feels like a stupid kid going to prom or some shit, and it's both embarrassing and kind of exciting to be in that position right now, with her. He does it. He slips his arm loosely around her waist, tentative at first, willing to let it fall away again at a moment's notice if she doesn't seem to like it.]

We're just gonna be wandering around too. Unless you had any ideas in mind. Anywhere you wanna go?

[fujimaru]

[ When he does that, she startles, then melts into the contact. Her head finally dips enough to lean against his shoulder, and there's a small soft smile on her lips. Yeah, she could get used to this. She likes this. ]

Not really. I think it'd be nice to wander with company.

[impostorsyndrome]

Let's just walk.

[She's leaning on him . . . she's so soft. Kadoc feels deeply aware of her right now in every sensory fashion. Her scent, her warmth, the sound of her breath, it's all captivating. And he can't think about it too hard if he doesn't want to embarrass himself in front of her by getting turned on by it—just this? Seriously?! He squeezes his arm around her, heading out with her into the street.]

. . . I'm having a good time tonight.

[fujimaru]

Me too!

[ She says it brightly, the pleasure of it bubbling out of her. There's something that feels good in a simple, steady way to be held like this, and all she wants is to stay close. It might take a moment to figure out how they should walk together, but once they do, Ritsuka isn't sure she's ever felt happier. ]

It almost feels silly to say so, but I just feel good.

[impostorsyndrome]

I don't think there's anything silly about that. I mean . . . if you didn't, I'd be worried why you were agreeing to go out with me.

[Ahhh. It still feels nerve-wracking to say, in a good way—she's going out with him! They're going out! Not just on a date tonight! The girl on his arm right now is going out with him. Amazing.]

[fujimaru]

That goes both ways.

[ She ducks her head slightly to emphasize their height difference a little more as she peers up at him. There's still that smile playing on her lips, soft and fond, unable to hold it back. ]

I'd feel bad if you were unhappy about it. I guess this is what they'd call a feedback loop?

[impostorsyndrome]

Yeah. Gross.

[Of course he doesn't mean it. It's a stupid joke, and he smiles back at her—a smile that would be bright and playful if he were more confident, but instead it's more awkwardly playful. Joke? Joke??]

[fujimaru]

I haven't even begun to show you gross. Get ready.

[ It's a joke! She's just happy he's being silly, and she can make this "threat" as if it actually means something. He can make of it what he wants. ]

[impostorsyndrome]

Bring it on.

[He says that with more confidence than he says most anything. Maybe he even sounds cool for a second. He sounds a little cool to himself, even though what he's asking for here is for her to be embarrassing and sappy at him, and that's . . . no, that is cool, actually.]

[fujimaru]

Are you sure?

[ Now she's the one embarrassed, instead of being the embarrassing one! But she can't help it, still smiling almost helplessly in response to his challenge. She leans a little heavier on him for a moment, even as they're still walking. ]

I think if I let myself, I could get really embarrassing.

[impostorsyndrome]

Oh yeah? Tell me what embarrassing shit you think you might do. Just so I can be sure.

[It's flirting, but he also really wants to know. Not because he actually thinks there's any danger of him disliking it . . . there's definitely not, in his opinion. But he wants to tease her gently, too, and think about what she says, and look forward to it later.]

[fujimaru]

If I tell you, doesn't it ruin the surprise?

[ She can't give away all of her secrets! Not yet. But she does tighten her grip where her arm is hooked with his, grinning up at him. ]

I'm doing some of it right now, though. What're your feelings on PDA?

[impostorsyndrome]

. . . I hate it when other people do it, but if it's you . . . maybe I'd like to be the one showing off that I have a hot girlfriend for once.

[PDA is so annoying! When it's not him. Probably. He doesn't have any experience to go on here, but he can make a guess that . . . yeah, it sounds kinda nice.]

[fujimaru]

That's--

[ A startled little laugh bursts out of her, cutting herself off. A hot girlfriend?! Where?

But she can't deny it feels good to hear it. Even if she doesn't agree about her looks, the fact that he's saying it makes her happy. He's not a guy who just needlessly flatters people, after all. ]

Do you really wanna show me off? Are you sure?

[impostorsyndrome]

Yeah, I do. You don't believe me? . . . Maybe you really are like me in some ways.

[After all, he wouldn't get it if she said the same about him. But still! Especially right now, when she laughs like that, because he made her happy . . . yeah, she's a beautiful girl.]

[fujimaru]

It's a little hard to believe.

[ She can say that easily, if a little embarrassed, leaning into him as they walk. ]

Not because I don't trust you... it's just hard to apply that to myself. I've never thought of myself that way.

[impostorsyndrome]

That's what I mean about us being the same . . . I get it.

[He pauses. Kadoc feels like a parody of himself saying this next part, but he just can't help it:]

Except for the part where you actually are hot. Can't relate.

[fujimaru]

You say that, but I'm telling you, I'm worried about your eyes...

[ But she's smiling as she says it. This is probably going to be one of those things that they'll never really agree on, but it's a much nicer feeling than the last rift between them. She'd much rather have a silly, inconsequential disagreement about looks than the divide that had existed between Chaldea's Master and the Cyrpters.

She swings their hands a little, huffing. ]

You're hot to me. Isn't that enough?

[impostorsyndrome]

. . . You really think that.

[Whoa. She's not lying, is she? She said it! She really said that. It's not just that she likes him in spite of his looks, which he still wouldn't truly have understood, but it would have at least made more sense to him than this. But he believes her.

Whoa.]

[fujimaru]

Yes?

[ She gives him a mildly confused look. Of course she means it? She wouldn't say something like that without being sincere; even without the threat of Kiyohime breathing down her neck, she doesn't particularly like being a liar. ]

I don't say what I don't mean.

[impostorsyndrome]

I know. I know that about you . . . it's just me. Being me, as usual. I just can't believe you're into guys like me.

[It's not really that Kadoc thinks he's hideous so much as he knows he has a very specific aesthetic, and he plays to it, knowing that trying to look like anything else would be ridiculous on him. Imagine him deciding to pivot to polo shirts and chinos. Or Hawaiian shirts. No, he was destined to be the scrawny emo punk he is, and while he knows the look has its fans, he's more surprised when someone is one than when they aren't.]

[fujimaru]

I like a lot of things.

[ It's perhaps the most blatant admission she can allow herself about her tastes. This isn't something she could've ever said to a Servant, even one that she was actually attracted to; there are too many who would take it as permission to pursue.

And as nice as that might've been... in the end, Ritsuka is interested in another human like her. That's her bigger confession. ]

But I don't know what you thought I'd be into. Do I seem like the kind of girl who likes a preppy boy?

[impostorsyndrome]

. . . I dunno.

[When she asks it like that, Kadoc really isn't sure. Does she seem like that type? She doesn't, but she also doesn't not. He can imagine her with . . . all kinds of people, if he tries, though he'd rather not, thanks. He has before and hasn't liked the thought much!]

I guess I can see you with different types. If I wanted to think about that.

[fujimaru]

So you're saying you think I'm easy.

[ But she's smiling as she says it. The joke is as much at her expense as his, though she's not surprised at his comment. Ritsuka has always been at her happiest to scatter her attentions and affections in a platonic sense, and she's never had either reason or pull to come to earth and focus.

For a romantic relationship, though? She wants to be pulled down into someone's field of gravity. ]

[impostorsyndrome]

N-no! I didn't mean it like that.

[She's smiling, but Kadoc still feels the sting of fear that maybe he seriously misstepped? Even if she's not acting like it?! He said something stupidly blunt again! He half-lifts a hand, placating, but his ears are bright pink with the embarrassment.]

You're messing with me, right? I swear I didn't mean it that way.